2:04 p.m. - 2008-05-12
THE PARTY
THE PARTY was a blast.

I was touch & go even up to the official start time, but I held it together. I almost lost it while in the shower. Why do birthday parties scare me so? I know most of the history on mine, and I mostly understand why they hurt so much. But why do they have to hurt at all? Isn't the point to celebrate ME? to celebrate the anniversary of MY birth? To acknowledge my place in the world?

Yes. Yes. And, yes.

That's why they hurt for me. I had it ingrained within me that none of those things were worth properly celebrating, and when they were celebrated it was more to satisfy someone else's need than mine.

So much for the kvetching.

The party was GREAT!

The food was magnificent. Homemade genuine Italian antipasti. yum yum yum!
Fabulous wine, and a house full of my friends.

The last there was the important part. A house full of my friends.

Wow... a year ago I swore they didn't exist. Last weekend I finally got up the nerve to publicly acknowledge that they did.

I also learned that single malt scotch gets my brothers to stick around, open up and talk. This was the second incidence of this happening. While this is merely a trend, it is one I shall encourage until it is a tradition.

The wife was incredibly generous and caring all weekend. She really tried her best to keep me out of the party preparations. She also did great on curbing her anxiety. I even got a bit of a pass on Sunday and didn't have to work as hard as she did to help clean up. I felt like a king.

Yay me!
Yay wife!
Yay brothers!
Yay friends!

I'm glad to have celebrated my 50th birthday. Life is good.

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